fbpx

Jewish Wedding

The Rituals to a Blessed Jewish Wedding

Mazel tov! Must have been what Laban said to Jacob after he enthusiastically unveiled his kallah or bride and found, Leah. As a chatan or groom, his father in-law had tricked him. The second ritual in a traditional Jewish wedding dispels this by ensuring that only the chatan does the veiling.

Traditions and Customs

Traditions and customs in a Jewish wedding are not only a precaution about the past but also symbolize divine blessings on a new union. The ceremony has remained the same for thousands of years since biblical times, despite minor adjustments to suite modern Judaism.

A typical Jewish wedding proceeds as follows:

  • It starts off at a pre-wedding reception also known as Kabbalat Panim.
    Traditionally the couple begin fasting right before this ceremony that includes them being in separate adjacent reception rooms. The chatan is read and sang to as the kallah receives encouragement from family and friends. To mark the end, the mother in-laws break a plate. This is done to indicate commitment to the relationship.
  • The second ritual is called the veiling of the bride or Badeken.
    The groom gets to place a veil over his bride’s face to symbolize the value he places in her inner beauty over her outward temporary beauty. After the veiling, the parents bless the kallah before proceeding to where the canopy is set up.
  • Then there is a wedding procession.
    Here, escorts holding candles, lock elbows with the couple and leads them to the Chuppah.
  • The bride or kallah is escorted to a marriage canopy. Popularly referred to as the Chuppah, most of the marriage ceremony is conducted under the structure.
    There are many biblical symbolism associated with the canopy or Chuppah. One of the customs is to have it under the stars to symbolize God blessing Abraham to have as many children as the stars. This is the place the bride circles the groom seven times to figuratively build a new world as a couple just as God created in seven days. The structure could be stand alone or held up by attendants. As a symbol of a new home, the chuppah is designed with open sides just like Abraham and Sarah’s tent represented open hospitality. The couple doesn’t wear jewelry while under the marriage canopy to attest that the union is not based on material things but their personality.
  • Now, the ceremony officially begins with, the Betrothal, also known as Kiddushin.
    Here, the chatan puts a ring on a kallah’s finger while declaring that the bride has been consecrated to him by Law of Moses and Israel. The act is only deemed valid in the presence of two witnesses. The custom according to the Torah is that only the groom gives a ring to his bride under the canopy. After ceremonial blessings the couple is now officially newlyweds and that marks the end of the first half of a Jewish wedding.
  • Immediately after exchanging the ring, a marriage contract or the Ketubah is read out aloud. Then signed by two witnesses.
    A Ketubah is a legally binding document that outlines the chatan’s responsibility to his kallah. The document then becomes the possession of the wife.
  • The officiator or rabbi then recites the Sheva Brachot or the seven blessings. These recitations are meant to affirm faith in the creator and blessings on the marriage. The prayers are concluded by the couple drinking some wine from the cup they have been holding throughout the recitations.
  • To end the ceremony a glass wrapped in cloth is stepped on by the groom in remembrance to the destruction of Jerusalem. At the moment the glass shatters everyone shouts, “Mazel tov!” A Jewish exclamation that means, congratulations or good luck.
  • Right after the newlyweds get some private time alone in a room called the Yichud or the seclusion room. Here, they get to customarily exchange gifts and have something to eat after fasting since the beginning of the ceremony.
  • After a few minutes in seclusion the couple head to the wedding reception. The wedding party may decide to have it in another location depending on preference.
    This is a time to be glad and merry. The guests join husband and wife in song and dance. Traditionally the men dance separately from the women after a mechitzah or partition is placed between them. After the dancing the couple joins their parents and VIP guests at the high table. The groom goes on to recite a blessing while holding a large special Shabbat bread called challah. After blessing it, the special loaf gets shared with among the crowd. At this point everyone gets to dig in and enjoy the meals provided.
  • A Jewish wedding is never complete without Grace after Meals.
    Grace after Meals is a sequence of seven blessings that are recited over the drinking of wine. Six honored guests get to recite the blessings as they hold the Sheva Brachot cup. Sheva Brachot or the wedding blessings are recited to instill divine blessing into the couple’s new life. For a week after a Jewish wedding ceremony relatives and friends of the newlyweds honor them with meals and Sheva Brachot is recited after every meal.

Mazel tov! These are some of the necessary rituals that make up a blessed Jewish wedding. Different Jewish groups may opt to carry out some steps before others but the procedure has always remained the same. For example the Sephardim break the glass at the end while the Ashkenazi usually breaks it before the Ketubah gets read out aloud.

The Jewish Wedding Attire

The chatan covers his head with a yarmulke or the kippah. The purpose of covering one’s head is to show respect of God. After wearing a suit or tallit also known as a prayer shawl, he puts on a kittel or white cotton robe over his shoulder.

The kallah is dressed in a traditional white wedding gown with a high collar. The shoulders and elbows are supposed to be covered. Their faces also get covered by a veil, a tradition that dates back to Laban and Jacob’s biblical times.

Male guests are at liberty to wear suits as women should dress modestly. The dress code is sometimes dependent on the venue of the Jewish wedding. Jewish wedding held at a synagogue will require women to cover their shoulders.

As much as the dress code for a traditional Jewish wedding may resemble that of a modern western wedding, there are a few things that do not feature in an American wedding.

For instance a traditional Jewish wedding can never take place during Shabbat. Shabbat is the period between Friday evening and Saturday evening, precisely after sundown. They are not also held during any of the holidays on a Jewish calendar. This is in contrast to a majority of American weddings that are always held on a Saturday and every other holiday.

Settling the Bill

One of the main purchases for a Jewish wedding is the Chuppah or canopy, a symbolic structure absent from American weddings. The canopy is paid for by the bride and her family.

A Jewish wedding may differ slightly from an American wedding in terms of cost sharing.

Here is a list of items the kallah and her family is responsible for providing:

  • Paying for the synagogue and the music there.
  • Buying the bride’s dress and accompanying accessories.
  • All the floral arrangements to be used at the ceremony.
  • Arranging for video and photographs.
  • Organizing for an engagement party.
  • Settling all bills for services like catering and decoration.
  • Settling wedding party’s transportation costs.
  • Paying for all wedding print outs and advertisement.
  • Paying for the chatan’s ring.

On the other hand here is a list of what the chatan and his family pays for:

  • Paying for the kallah’s ring.
  • Buying the liquor and hirings a band or DJ.
  • Hosting rehearsal dinner.
  • Paying for honeymoon.
  • Paying for corsages, boutonnieres and bride’s bouquet.
  • Paying for groom’s clothing.
  • Settling the marriage license fees and hiring the officiant.

Apart from the above split, the attendees usually pay for their shoes and attire. Once everything has been paid for it’s time for enjoyment.

Entertainment

The music at a traditional Jewish wedding is dominantly, Hora, a term for popular Jewish themed traditional songs. Non-strict Jews will rarely have a mix of non-Jewish songs at a traditional Jewish wedding. Traditional Jewish music is played when the kallah enters and at the end of the ceremony.

Dance music is mainly performed at the reception after the couple emerges from the Yichud. Men will dance separately from the women at a traditional Jewish wedding reception.

In terms of meals, kosher foods are a preference among many Jews. Kosher foods are meals that are prepared properly according to dietary laws known as Kashrut. These are laws laid out by the Torah on how food should be handled and what should be regarded as food.

The two Jewish ethnic groups may opt for slightly different meals. The Sephardi will go for spicy chicken, lamb with couscous or rice while their cousins the Ashkenazi Jews enjoy roast chicken, vegetables and potatoes.

Conclusion

The Jews have observed the same rituals that make up a traditional wedding for millennia and they are not about to change. The main believe is that these steps are necessary to instill divine blessings into the lives of newlyweds. The Jewish nation attributes their historical prosperity to their strict adherence to the wedding rituals as outlined in the Torah. 

New Articles

Afghan Wedding

Afghan Wedding

Cultural Weddings
Hawaiian Wedding

Hawaiian Wedding

Cultural Weddings
French Wedding

French Wedding

Cultural Weddings

EventDone LLC


We went Virtual!
Woo Hoo - working from home!


Contact
Privacy Policy
Legal Terms
Careers

Contact


Telephone: +1 (703) 239 - 6410

Fax: +1 (703) 574 - 8320

Information: info@eventdone.com

Support: support@eventdone.com

Privacy Notice

This privacy notice discloses the privacy practices for eventdone.com. This privacy notice applies solely to information collected by this website. It will notify you of the following: What personally identifiable information is collected from you through the website, how it is used and with whom it may be shared. What choices are available to you regarding the use of your data. The security procedures in place to protect the misuse of your information. How you can correct any inaccuracies in the information. Information Collection, Use, and Sharing We are the sole owners of the information collected on this site. We only have access to/collect information that you voluntarily give us via email or other direct contact from you. We will not sell or rent this information to anyone. We will use your information to respond to you, regarding the reason you contacted us. We will not share your information with any third party outside of our organization, other than as necessary to fulfill your request, e.g. to ship an order. Unless you ask us not to, we may contact you via email in the future to tell you about specials, new products or services, or changes to this privacy policy. Your Access to and Control Over Information You may opt out of any future contacts from us at any time. You can do the following at any time by contacting us via the email address or phone number given on our website: See what data we have about you, if any. Change/correct any data we have about you. Have us delete any data we have about you. Express any concern you have about our use of your data. Security We take precautions to protect your information. When you submit sensitive information via the website, your information is protected both online and offline. Wherever we collect sensitive information (such as credit card data), that information is encrypted and transmitted to us in a secure way. You can verify this by looking for a lock icon in the address bar and looking for "https" at the beginning of the address of the Web page. While we use encryption to protect sensitive information transmitted online, we also protect your information offline. Only employees who need the information to perform a specific job (for example, billing or customer service) are granted access to personally identifiable information. The computers/servers in which we store personally identifiable information are kept in a secure environment. If you feel that we are not abiding by this privacy policy, you should contact us immediately via telephone at (703) 239-6410 or via email found in our contacts page.

Legal Terms: Last Updated 4/19/2019

Please read these Terms and Conditions ("Terms", "Terms and Conditions") carefully before using the http://www.eventdone.com (change this) website and the EventDone mobile application (the "Service") operated EventDone. Your access to and use of the Service is conditioned on your acceptance of and compliance with these Terms. These Terms apply to all visitors, users and others who access or use the Service. By accessing or using the Service you agree to be bound by these Terms. If you disagree with any part of the terms then you may not access the Service. Links To Other Web Sites Our Service may contain links to third-party web sites or services that are not owned or controlled by EventDone LLC. EventDone has no control over, and assumes no responsibility for, the content, privacy policies, or practices of any third party web sites or services. You further acknowledge and agree that EventDone shall not be responsible or liable, directly or indirectly, for any damage or loss caused or alleged to be caused by or in connection with use of or reliance on any such content, goods or services available on or through any such web sites or services. Changes We reserve the right, at our sole discretion, to modify or replace these Terms at any time. If a revision is material, we notify you through a usage dialogue of any new terms taking effect. What constitutes a material change will be determined at our sole discretion. Contact Us If you have any questions about these Terms, please contact us.

Careers

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam, quis nostrud exercitation ullamco laboris nisi ut aliquip ex ea commodo consequat. Duis aute irure dolor in reprehenderit in voluptate velit esse cillum dolore eu fugiat nulla pariatur. Excepteur sint occaecat cupidatat non proident, sunt in culpa qui officia deserunt mollit anim id est laborum.

Copyright © 2018 - 2024 EventDone LLC. All rights reserved.